BEN'S FAVORITE QUOTES

• This paper is 100% unrecycled. Whole forests were leveled, thousands of small furry animals left homeless, and vast virgin landscapes devastated, to make this product.
• WARNING: This product has been proven to cause harm to labratory animals, so please refrain from using it in or near labratories where animals are kept.
• Sooner started, sooner done, sooner outside having fun. - Anonymous (understandably)
• Never put off today what you can do tomorrow.
• If you want people to know where you stand, wear the same socks for two weeks.
• The distance between two points is how far apart they are.
• He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool. Avoid him.
  He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is ignorant. Teach him.
  He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep. Waken him.
  He who knows, and knows that he knows,is a wise man. Follow him.
  He who knows not weather he knows or knows not anything at all, is a politician. Get rid of him.
• Curosity killed Schroëndengers cat.
• The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always certain of themselves, but wiser poeple are full of doubts... I think.
• Blessed is the rebel - without him there would be no progress.
• There are very few problems that cannot be solved by the suitable application of high explosives.
• A penny for your thoughts, twenty bucks to act them out.
• Indecision is the key to flexibility.
• People in groups tend to agree on courses of action that as individuals they know are stupid.
• It is difficult to win an argument when your opponent is unencumbered with knowledge of the facts.
• If the first person who answers the phone cannot answer your question, its a bureaucracy.
• You're not drunk if you can lay on the floor without hanging on.
• A lot of what appears to progress is just so much technological rococo.
• If it's worth doing it's worth hiring someone who knows how to do it.
• 186,000 miles per second, it's not just a good idea it's the law.
• But sorry as you are, I love you for the fumbling grace with which you wipe the drool off your chin.
• The statue of Justice holds a sword.
• You stand as the single most nauseating experience of my generally nausea-enriched life.
• It stands to reason that where there's sacrifice, there's someone collecting the sacrificial offerings. Where there is service, there is some one being served. The man who speaks to you of sacrifice speaks to you of slaves and masters. And intends to be the master. -Ayn Rand
• Rowell's frequent articles on conservation have a rather impassioned sincere ring, but lack the fine narrow-mindedness of the true zealot.
• What makes you think you'll live long enough to be dead anyway?
• Why do people keep buying shampoo when they can always have real poo?
• Patience comes to those who wait.
• Here we have a game that combines the charm of a Pentagon briefing with the excitement of double-entry bookkeeping. I don't get it.
• Sure, nipple rings make for interesting conversation. As do decorative tattoos. But nothing compares to a good old fashion scar.

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